After Singapore trip, woman says ‘nobody judges you’ abroad but ‘everything feels like a performance’ at home

Taking to X, Sanya shared her experience of spending a few weeks in Singapore last year. What stood out to her was not the skyline or the food, but something far subtler.

“I spent a few weeks in Singapore last year. One thing I didn’t expect to notice: nobody looks at you. Ate alone at restaurants. Nobody stared. Worked out at odd hours. Nobody cared. Ordered a salad. No comments. Skipped alcohol. No questions. Did my own thing. No opinions. Strange at first. Then freeing.”

She contrasted this with what she described as the constant social commentary she experiences back home.

“Back home, everything is a performance. Eat healthy — ‘diet pe ho kya?’ Go to gym — ‘itna body banake kya karega?’ Skip dessert — ‘thoda toh le lo.’ Sleep early — ‘boring ho gaya hai.’ Say no to drinks — ‘sab theek hai na?’ Every choice has an audience. Every decision has a comment.”

According to her, this pattern was not limited to Singapore. “This isn’t just Singapore. Malaysia. Bali. Thailand. Japan. Same pattern everywhere I’ve traveled. People mind their own business. Health is personal. Nobody’s watching. And most people just give up because doing the right thing is exhausting when it comes with judgment.”

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One user wrote, “Having a fit body is a flex in India, you cant flex it there.” Another commented, “This is deeply relatable. In India, the community is strong, but sometimes it blurs into commentary. What you experienced in Singapore isn’t just ‘people don’t care.’ It’s a cultural respect for personal boundaries.”

A third user reacted more casually, writing, “Accurate. lol. I like it tho.” Someone else added nuance to the debate, saying, “Strangers don’t judge, this is not about Singapore vs your home town this is strangers and known vs friends and closed ones.”

Echoing Sanya’s sentiment, another comment read, “You can be just you. Even if the outfits and your footwear or anything else doesnt matches, almost no one stares or cares.” One more user simply wrote, “I completely agree with you.”

(Disclaimer: This report is based on user-generated content from social media. HT.com has not independently verified the claims and does not endorse them.)